Are you a ‘rant-buddy’?

I know that there is no such word, I totally made it up.


After reading Psych Babblers post today..something prompted me to write this post. She has written about our intense desire to be people pleasers at a cost which sometimes harms our self esteem and how we cannot please all people.


We are social creatures and as such we need friends to be a part of this exciting journey we call life. When I was growing up, I had tons of friends, so many that my parents were alarmed at the number of people who turned up to celebrate my birthday. Slowly, as time passed some friends disappeared from my life and new ones came in.


Every woman needs girlfriends in her life, there are some things your better half will never be able to understand even if he is your soul mate. We can discuss almost everything under the sun with our girlfriends right from, why we get angry with our maids, guests who drop in unannounced and leave a mess in the house, the latest fashion trends and the rising cost of fresh fruits and vegetables.
Lately, I have observed that I have become a rant-buddy for most of my friends. They will call me just to rant about things which annoy them. I have no problems listening to their problems when someone is going through a difficult period in their life. Believe me, I have been in that position myself a few times so I do empathize. But the issue is when some friends who are doing well and still call up just to to barf out (every time, without fail) how miserable their life is , all you do is end up saying ‘Hmmm’, ‘Oh No’,’things will get better’ , ‘Yes,  I understand,’ in every conversation, it starts grating on your nerves. I tend to zone out and daydream of ‘ sarson ke khet with SRK and Kajol prancing around cows’. Frankly, I don’t want to do it but its is my body’s natural reaction to boring conversations.


For me a conversation has to be exchange of knowledge, ideas and information. There are so many things to talk about, you have music, books, movies and weather. I miss exciting conversations and the thrill of learning something new when I speak to someone. These days all the conversation are  peppered with ‘Aur Kya? (what else) a number of times because we are at a loss to talk about things.


Maybe it is in my nature to make everyone like me, hence I tolerate these stilted conversations. I can never cut off people or feign that I am busy. Even when I call to have a casual chat, some people have the knack to change the entire direction of the conversation to make it all about themselves and how miserable life is and how busy they are that they don’t have time even to breathe. Such conversations frustrate me and I end up feeling like a fool to have called up in the first place.


How about you? Do you ever feel like a rant-buddy? What do you do when you are a rant-buddy and you want things to change?


I would like some help from you people.


P.S: Ohh shucks!!....here I go and make a simple post into a rant post. Maybe I am learning the knack.