Sunday, 5 April 2015

Is goodbye just another word?

A few days back, I was listening to one of Lobo's song, "Goodbye is just another word", and it got me thinking about whether that is true. Is goodbye just another word?

Goodbye means till we meet again. When I was younger, saying goodbye to someone did not put a thought in my mind. Life was fresh, full of promises and my eyes were focussed on the future. Now, I am looking back more than ever..some would call it midlife..or taking stock. Whatever it is, I am looking at the past and have dissected it to shreds, turned it upside down, inside out and have pondered deeply about the choices I have made in life. I keep thinking of the relationships that were made and torn down, the people who came into my life, people who decided to leave and people who have stayed with me for nearly three decades.

I have come to realize one thing, these days, for me, it has become harder to say goodbye. Like fleeting shadows, people have been passing through life, old friends, colleagues and family members. At this point in time, old foundations have crumbled, leaving the dust and grit in my eyes. The dust has not even settled and it is time for me to say goodbye to many.

When people come in your life, they come as a breath of fresh air, pumping life-changing moments in your mundane everyday existence. They bring with them their bit of sunshine and unique perspectives that color your thoughts. Some people leave your life and they take some lessons from you and others leave you with a hard learned lesson that changes you to the core, so much so that you can't even recognize your own self. Some say it is a part of the healing process while I believe that the experience touches you at a different level and makes you question yourself more than ever. You end up distancing yourself from the way you have been with them, and try your best to find who you are now.

Pic courtesy:www.pixteller.com
As people say goodbye, more often than not they just drift away and become strangers. Most times it is not intentional, life just happens and they get caught up in its intricacies. The connections you form, they take with them a piece of your heart, of shared dreams and experiences and leave you with a slice of their own world. The impression they leave on you, influences your mind and many a times, there is a gradual shift in the thought process especially, when the bonds have been meaningful.

Over the years, any relationship goes through its own ebbs and flows. It brings people closer or people break and drift away from you. Sometimes, you come across the same people later in life. Meeting them is somewhat like a half-remembered song or of a familiar perfume whose bottle has changed.

I keep hearing about how change is good and how it is the only permanent thing in life. As Kathleen Kelly from the movie You've got mail says: "People are always telling you that change is a good thing. But all they're really saying is that something you didn't want to happen at all... has happened."

Saying goodbye to people with whom you shared a strong bond, is life changing. Try as you might, these changes are hard and it is hard to come to terms with them. You struggle and you try to live each day believing that this change is good for you. You learn to survive every day and move forward. Goodbye then doesn't remain just another word anymore, it becomes a process of letting go. 

2 comments:

Suranga Date said...

Actually, its best to think of oneself as a flow , say of a river. Some tributaries join at points, some rivulets shoot off at points. The river flow is continuous, despite huge boulders, falls and underground currents. And so there is no concept of goodbye. It is all about looking ahead. And smiling to yourself, as the trees and woods along the banks applaud....

Lazy Pineapple said...

Yes that too will happen with time...but when you are in the vortex...things are blurry...

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