Friday, 18 June 2010

What’s in a name, you say?

"What's in a name? That which we call a rose
By any other name would smell as sweet."




These famous lines by Shakespeare have been repeated many times by many people when they screw up your name and then instead of saying ‘Sorry’, give you this statement very cheekily.

Now,It is time to come out of the closet…


Dang..you people have a one track mind…I meant come out and declare my name in public and not what you thought. 


All this while I have been writing under the name ‘Lazy Pineapple’ and will continue to do so…but many of you are curious to know my real name and some of you actually do know it. Then again, those who know my name manage to screw it up…And I mean royally. My parents will cringe when they come to know of this fallacy.


My real name is Vinita (which means Humble), V I N I T A and not Vineeta, Vinuta, Vineetha, Vinitha or Vineta. Most people end up up calling me Vineeta which again is not my name, even if it seems like my name. Its so easy to write my name..even westerners can pronounce this Sanskrit name with ease.


Ok, now I have managed to piss off most of you…let me talk about something else.

Most parents these days try to name their children with unique names which makes them stand out from the crowd. When my sister delivered twins, she decided to name her kids with names which cannot be twisted to sound like something perverse or something which rhymes with a a human body part. You see, she lives in USA and kids there are quite creative when it comes to bullying in school.


In a race to be as unique and as cuckoo as possible, Hollywood celebrities take the cake. They are trying to outdo each other when it comes naming their children with absolutely ludicrous names. Here are a few examples:


1) Chris Martin and Gwyneth Paltrow named their daughter ‘Apple’-  what gives?? I thought of all the jokes about Apples and I feel so darn sorry for the Kid.


2) Sylvester Stallone’s daughter is called  ‘Sage Moon Blood’- I am speechless…sounds like a vampires name.


3) Another Celebrity, Frank Zappa, all his children have bizarre names-  Moon Unit, Dweezil, Diva Muffin, Ahmet Emuukkha Rodan – SOB!


Imagine having a name like Moon Unit or  Diva Muffin…my name sounds so ordinary :P in comparison..


4) Jaimie Oliver the celebrated British chef has named his daughters  Poppy Honey Rosie, Daisy Boo Pamela and Petal Blossom Rainbow- Argggggghhh!!!


5) Steven Spielberg has named is son ‘Destry’- seems like a cross between destiny and trying - What wonderful creativity…


6) If you are flat out of names, just name your child ‘Kyd’…and that is what David Duchovny (X files) and Tea Leoni did - How inspiring :)


Pilot Inspektor, Satchel, Moxie Crimefighter, Zolten, Seven Sirius, Puma, Mars, Fifi Trixibelle, Peaches, Pixie and Bluebell Madonna. These are some more celebrity baby names.


I feel that the celebrities try to project all their quirkiness and personalities by naming their children with such bizarre names. With such names the kids are bound to need tonnes of therapy, after being bullied at school. Its a good thing that their parents earn money by the truckload.



P.S:Romeo Montague and Juliet Capulet meet and fall in love in Shakespeare's lyrical tale of "star-crossed" lovers. They are doomed from the start as members of two warring families. Here Juliet tells Romeo that a name is an artificial and meaningless convention, and that she loves the person who is called "Montague", not the Montague name and not the Montague family. Romeo, out of his passion for Juliet, rejects his family name and vows, as Juliet asks, to "deny (his) father" and instead be "new baptized" as Juliet's lover. This one short line encapsulates the central struggle and tragedy of the play.
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43 comments:

Journomuse said...

Wow, V what a spectacular way to 'come out of the closet' so to speak..Wonder if we are starting to think too alike, but just last month I had a post by the same name..Though in that, I lazily just counted the names of all those people I end up meeting who make it difficult for me to keep a straight face..
Btw, in the football season we need to sympathise with Brooklyn and Romeo for their parents, the Beckhams ultimate sappy taste in names...Angelina's taste is also the Pitts, I say..;)

Tavish Chadha(sensible-bakwas.com) said...

yay i was one those lucky one who knew what LP's real name was! :D
Ok now I hope I wasnt in the list of ppl who screwed up ur name right? :)

well my name is pretty rare too... and it kinda feels nice but the names u quoted out ther are like aaargh!! I mean think of the poor kid ya... usko log kitna chidayenge... hehe

So aaj se no refering to u on ur blog as LP, its Vinita from now on :)

Shilpa said...

Even my name is twisted to no end... Instead of Shilpa, its shipa, shipla, ship (can you believe this one) and I really really hate this... :(

And LOL! at all those celebrity names.... :)

Chatterbox said...

This was a real fun read :D
Adding to this typical and very different celebrity kid names is Nicole Kidman's daughter "Sunday Rose" just cause she was born on a Sunday???
I guess it's the desire to have a one in a million (out of this world) name that motivates them to plunge in extreme creativity :D :D

I am huge fan of your pen-name; 'Lazy Pineapple'

Wonderful post Vinita :)

le embrouille blogueur said...

Nice post Vinita (had to scroll up to make sure I do not mis type it). Funny names. One time when we took out son to the doctor we met a couple whose daughter was name NEVEAH ...which is HEAVEN said backwards... I thought that was pretty neat !! Indian names are pretty hard for most non Indians to pronounce and they end up sounding to the most convenient sound alike. Enjoyed the celebrity names !!

Sovina said...

Vinita is a nice name..even my name is one which people abuse the way they want - soem call souveena, sabeena, sauvina etc etc ...but the one who gets it in first place says it is a real nice name..

http://weddingonthecards.blogspot.com/

Mr. Pramathesh said...

I am very Particular about my name. It is very lucky for me.

I really like the name Sage Moon Blood.

Actually it is the translation of an Indian Name. Hrishi Chandrakta. :P

indianhomemaker said...

LOL...Very interesting post! I think they just want a name that is unlikely to be repeated. In India we have had names like Hitler, Stalin, Lenin and I remember a family where the brothers were named Jenrail(General) Singh, Kernail Singh (Colonel), Major Singh, Kuptaan (captain) Singh :) The only sister had a boring name, Maya.

Shilpa Garg said...

I can understand completely!! Coz we have not 1 but 2 victims in our family! My hubby's name is Kshitij. K is silent in the pronunciation.
And he has different people calling him different names viz K-Shitij, Chhitij, Kishitij and some even Satish!!!!
And many more variants especially from the customer care call centre guys!!

And I hate it when I introduce myself as Shilpa, and people are quick to add Oooh...Shilpa Shetty (and much earlier Shilpa Shirodkar!!) Aarrgghhhh!!!!

But the celebrities giving such names for their kids is totally weird!!

bollywoodstylediaries said...

u have a sweet and simple name:-) Every time a celeb gives birth, I am dying to know the kid's name since u can expect it to be the wackiest!! but 'Diva Muffin' takes the cake or should I say muffin:-)

bollywoodstylediaries said...

just wanted to correct someone's comment - Nicole Kidman's daughter, 'Sunday Rose' was NOT born on Sunday:-) go figure:-)

magiceye said...

Oh Hi Vinita!
that was a fun rant!!

enjoyed it!!

deepak

Smitha said...

I have a similar saga about people miss pronouncing and misspelling my name :)I blogged about it too some time back.

As for celebrity names, I can't understand why anybody would name their children like this! Forget about bullying, who would like to be saddled with names like Apple or blood?? When we were naming our daughter, we had struck off so many names because they had the potential to be shortened or changed to something embarrassing for her. There is no saying that that won't happen with her name as of now, but we have tried our best to protect her :)

AmitL said...

haha..well, I've been called 'Amith' and'Ameet', so there...:)What's in a name,indeed..:)
----
People naming their kids,unusual names..haha..well, the funniest I've heard was in Seinfeld the serial. Kramer sees a triangle drawing made by Seinfeld, and says 'Isosceles' triangle. Isosceles-what a nice name- when I have a kid,I'll name him Isosceles.Read more of such classic dialogues at:

http://www.systems.caltech.edu/~rao/seinquotes.html

RGB said...

Destry - Could also be the abbrev.version of Desperately Trying. Hmm..wonder what! Some people don't seem to be able to pronounce a name with just 4 letters right, but a 16-letter name perfectly alright...Beats me!

Loved your post.

Chandrika Shubham said...

Nice to meet u Vinita. :)
Interesting post! :)

karan a said...

Vinita ji... :) I hope I have taken it correctly. lol

Yesterday itself I was discussion how names are changing and how much difficult it is to remember my distant cousins name and few friend's kids names... name like "Jeshna" "Arjav" spins my head and it is so challenging to remember each one of them... parents showing all the creativity in naming their kids! lol

Seeker said...

Interesting , strange and very scary , i mean the names . but may be some day our names too would have sounded the same way to people who had named their kids otherwise . I heard everything is ..indeed in a name . We even adress ourselves with our name ! very hard to imagine a world withoutt name in a very verbose world ! btw I do like the way you write . I am new to blogging , I read many and I say you have a certain quality which make things interesting to read

Anjali said...

My General knowledge of useless information just increased many fold thanks to celebrity kid names :)
Well, my name Anjali is butchered as well. I have taken the simple route of not wasting my energy on explaining it to people. Except when it is at workplace.
Angel, Angelique, Angie, Angela, Anjaalee. I have heard it all. If it remotely resembles my name, I respond. :)

Aparna said...

Hi Vinita, nice to meet you!
My husband's name which is actually quite common in Bengali can be a tongue twister in other languages. My daughters learned to pronounce it only when they were 7 plus. Till that age, my elder daughter always said, "I don't know" every time somebody asked her who her father was!
Nice post:-)

Purba said...

Now a post about why you chose "Lazy Pineapple"

Nish said...

my friend's nam is Biraj and god knows how manu\y versions of it he has heard, and thus barely manages to remember the real pronounciation himself :)

That celebrity kids nae were crazy.Being a IT professioal i would nam my kids "Copy Paste" :)

Pooja said...

Hello Vinita... that one was definitely a mystery huh ;)..

as for points 1 to 6, what the hell were they thinking.. nice find!!

Lakshmi Rajan said...

I kinda knew your actual name but then since I knew your first as Lazy Pineapple , I am more comfy calling you LP :)

and talking about name ... Am one caught in a lady's name :D and been confusing strangers the time I was named :P heehee

btw, I feel sorry for the celebrity kids . Holy cow! how would any sane person name his/her kids like that :S ... Oh I meant sane right ? that explains ;)

Guria said...

I have the same trouble with my name trying to make them spell it without the H... Sigh! Interestingly, it is such an easy name to spell and pronounce otherwise but no Westerner can do it!! The forms that my name takes is funny (and horrible!)!
But you are talking about celebrities and their idiosyncrasies? Hear this, a respected scientist(!) in the Institute where I am right now is called Shampoo, and her sister is Lipstick... I swear! And I had initially thought my seniors were bullying me! :D :D

Bikramjit said...

HI vinita a good article well i have the same peoblem here in uk my nameis bikram but it has bexome bikraaaaaaam or bik or bikky or b all od it i have had so many argumennts over this name is important very i think. But yeh funny names some of the celebrities havegiven

wannabauthor said...

oh darn..i preferred when u were still LP to the world :( ..nyways good post :)

Meira said...

hahahaha!
I'l tell you someday why I chose to retain my maiden name after marriage ;)

Pankaj Batra said...

interesting post, Vinita

Viyoma said...

Haaahaa..tht was good!!

pal said...

Hmm.. any reason blogville is suddenly buzzing with posts on pseudo names vs real names... and now you have 'come clean' ;-))) Nice name, btw, Vinita :-)

Lazy Pineapple said...

Journomuse: Thanks :) oh did you write on the same subject?

Tavish: You can call me Vinita or LP :)

Shilpa: OMG..your name is simple too...wonder how people can manage to jumble up your name..

CB: Thanks dear :)
celebrities try to be in the news anyhow..and naming their kids with weird names is one way :)

LEB: Thanks :)

Sovina: Yeah, you have such a pretty name...weird huh...how people can screw up simple names..

Pramathesh: ahh I am guilty of screwing up your name :P
Interesting fact about Sage moon blood :)

IHM: Thanks :)
I know...I have heard of it weird names...

Shilpa: Ouch..your poor hubby...he must feel like strangling people..
And you I guess must feel like hitting those people who use the 'Shilpa Shetty' dialogue :P

Sonali: Thanks :)

Deepak: Thanks :)

Smitha: I am sure your name must be changed just like mine :)
I can understand...naming your child these days is quite an exercise..

Amit: So many people's name are getting screwed up...even yours?

RGB: So agree with you...

Gyanban said...

he he - I once had a friend who's last name was solapurker - he kept getting mails as solar cooker, soap kukker etc.

Lazy Pineapple said...

Chandrika: Thanks :)

Karan: Parents these days no longer want to name their kids after bollywood film stars.

Seeker: mucho obliged :)

Anju: Oh no...angelique...so creative.

Aparna: Oh gosh...your poor hubby :P

Purba: Ohhh you can read....my 'About Me' section...

Nish: Oh no...very innovative..copy paste LOL

Pooja: Thanks :)

LR: I am so guilty....I had thought you were a woman :P

Guria: You totally made it up...Lipstick and Shampoo...?

Bikram: Thanks:)

Wannabauthor : haha :P

Meira: Do write a post on this...am so curious :)

Pankaj: Thanks :) welcome to my blog..

Viyoma: Thanks :) welcome to my blog..

Pal: Oh I know Guria wrote about it..but mine is a bit different from her post...

Ana_treek said...

lol

zephyr said...

Nice to know your real name, Vinita! (scrolling hard to check the spelling! he he)

that was an interesting (and weird) collection of names:D Whatever do parents think of when they give their kids such names?

You might like to read the post I'd written with the same title
http://cybernag.wordpress.com/2010/04/17/whats-in-a-name/

Farila said...

Hi Vinita... it is nice to say that after awkwardly calling you LazyPineapple for sometime.
I never knew celebrities were this stupid eeewwwww

rindojustrindo said...

You think YOU've got it bad? Try my name - the imaginative (and ludirous) "Rindo".

With imaginative nicknames like "Ringo", "Dingo", Bindu", "Rindo" and "Dildo" (yes, 'Dildo' indeed, aptly called out whenever I tried impressing the ladies, in my teen years), to say I had a traumatizing childhood would be an understatement.

I still haven't forgiven my parents. :P

Choco said...

sage moon blood....LOL :))

is it bad that vinita reminds me of Kwality Vienetta? :|
don't kill me now :)

Deeps said...

Very interesting post! Frankly speaking when I saw the title I thought it was another post about the clash between pseudo-names & real names. I had just blogged about it myself :).

I really liked the way you revealed your name to your readers, LP. Vinita(let me scroll up to see if spelled it right)is a nice name. I love Lazy Pinapple too :). I know how irritated I get when someone mispronounces/ misspells my name. Deepti is many a times spelled as DeepTHi(the typical malayali way), or Deepi(the arabs here often call me that), Deepa...I can very well elate to your frustration!

Thanks to our celebrities we get so much fodder for our posts, dont we?? :)

Saras said...

I agree with you Vinita. I get very upset when people misspell my name. Ofcourse when we see names like "Lubjcic", "Wozdat" etc we cant blame a few mistakes, lol

The Holy Lama said...

Well maybe they should meet the couple from Kerala who had children by names:
Beemol, Ceemol. Jeemol and Deemon, the last one the son

Rajendra Raikwar said...

awsome

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