I am at such an age in life where the best pastime possible is to crib about your better half with your close girl-friends. It is a sort of camaraderie which binds most married girlfriends. We discuss ‘almost’ everything with each other (Sex and the city was right about that) right from ‘issues with the maid’, ‘rising cost of living’, ‘recipes’ and ‘movies’ but ‘Crib about Hubby’ still being the best seller. The topic of discussion keeps changing as we enter into every new phase of our life.
I grew up surrounded by girl friends who were not too keen on discussing boys, they were more interested in movies, books and just having a good time. Not that I did not have my mandatory crushes or was not observant about ‘good looking’ chaps in college. But I was not the stereotypical giggling girl who would nudge her girlfriend whenever the heart throb of college passed by.
Then came the newly married phase when love and passion is in the air and your other half is the centre of your life and you are his. This phase passes very smoothly, you rejoice and actually start believing that miracles do happen and you are married to one. As the years pass by, you do see minor cracks in the facade and then realization dawns on you, you married a human being and just like you he too has little dents and scratches in his armor. The things you thought as sweet and adorable don’t seem so sweet and adorable now. Practical life picks you up by the scruff of your neck and shakes you so hard that the rainbow tinted glasses slip from your eyes. You try to patch up the armor , remove the dents and all this ends up in a lot of Nagging.
At this stage girlfriends come to your rescue, some things you cannot communicate with your better half. She acts as a buffer and helps you vent out your feelings and in one way shields your better half from harsh words and temporary anger.
The other day when I was chatting with a girlfriend about housework, we both ended up coming to the same conclusion. Husbands never realize that wives keep doing so many odd chores around the house which they never realize are to be done in the first place.
1) Washing Machine, Refrigerator, Microwave need to be cleaned on a regular basis. They do not clean themselves automatically.
2) Washed laundry needs to be folded and put away.
3) The soap dish needs regular cleaning else the leftover soap sticks to the soap dish with vengeance.
4) The drainer next to the sink also needs to be cleaned up or it gets slimy.
5) The shower head needs cleaning regularly.
6) The shower curtain needs to be washed often.
7) The bathroom mirrors need to be scrubbed, the medicine cabinet needs to be wiped down.
8) Endless surfaces in the house are magnets for dust and cobwebs.
9) Kitchen cabinet handles get sticky and need to be wiped clean.
10) Anything spilled does not evaporate but needs to be wiped down.
I hope you got the drift, as the list is endless.
Are men genetically programmed not to notice the dust on tabletops, the oily sheen on the wall over the stove and to leave their shoes at odd places all over the house?
I know that men too do many chores but they will never deviate from the designated chores. They will stick to the chores and will only do extra stuff when they are pushed into doing them.
This brought me to the following questions. Are women genetically programmed to burden themselves with housework? Do they get programmed since childhood into donning the apron just because they have seen their mothers do it? Do women get pressurized and bow down to housework to please their in-laws and husbands?
I feel all women need to change their mindset and learn to stop taking guilt trips on account of housework. Men never seem to go on such trips, they are blissfully unawares and are at peace. It is time we learnt their secret.
If Men are from Mars it is time women immigrated to Mars as living on Venus is no longer good for their sanity.