Saturday, 26 June 2010

Men are from Mars and Women want to be on Mars

I am at such an age in life where the best pastime possible is to crib about your better half with your close girl-friends. It is a sort of camaraderie which binds most married girlfriends. We discuss ‘almost’ everything with each other (Sex and the city was right about that) right from ‘issues with the maid’, ‘rising cost of living’, ‘recipes’ and ‘movies’ but ‘Crib about Hubby’ still being the best seller. The topic of discussion keeps changing as we enter into every new phase of our life.


I grew up surrounded by girl friends who were not too keen on discussing boys, they were more interested in movies, books and just having a good time. Not that I did not have my mandatory crushes or was not observant about ‘good looking’ chaps in college. But I was not the stereotypical giggling girl who would nudge her girlfriend whenever the heart throb of college passed by.


Then came the newly married phase when love and passion is in the air and your other half is the centre of your life and you are his. This phase passes very smoothly, you rejoice and actually start believing that miracles do happen and you are married to one. As the years pass by, you do see minor cracks in the facade and then realization dawns on you, you married a human being and just like you he too has little dents and scratches in his armor. The things you thought as sweet and adorable don’t seem so sweet and adorable now. Practical life picks you up by the scruff of your neck and shakes you so hard that the rainbow tinted glasses slip from your eyes. You try to patch up the armor , remove the dents and all this ends up in a lot of Nagging.

At this stage girlfriends come to your rescue, some things you cannot communicate with your better half. She acts as a buffer and helps you vent out your feelings and in one way shields your better half from harsh words and temporary anger.


The other day when I was chatting with a girlfriend about housework, we both ended up coming to the same conclusion. Husbands never realize that wives keep doing so many odd chores around the house which they never realize are to be done in the first place.

housework1) Washing Machine, Refrigerator, Microwave need to be cleaned on a regular basis. They do not clean themselves automatically.


2)  Washed laundry needs to be folded and put away.


3) The soap dish needs regular cleaning else the leftover soap sticks to the soap dish with vengeance.


4) The drainer next to the sink also needs to be cleaned up or it gets slimy.
5) The shower head needs cleaning regularly.


6) The shower curtain needs to be washed often.


7) The bathroom mirrors need to be scrubbed, the medicine cabinet needs to be wiped down.


8) Endless surfaces in the house are magnets for dust and cobwebs.


9) Kitchen cabinet handles get sticky and need to be wiped clean.


10) Anything spilled does not evaporate but needs to be wiped down.


I hope you got the drift, as the list is endless.


Are men genetically programmed not to notice the dust on tabletops, the oily sheen on the wall over the stove and to leave their shoes at odd places all over the house?


I know that men too do many chores but they will never deviate from the designated chores. They will stick to the chores and will only do extra stuff when they are pushed into doing them.


This brought me to the following questions. Are women genetically programmed to burden themselves with housework? Do they get programmed since childhood into donning the apron just because they have seen their mothers do it?  Do women get pressurized and bow down to housework to please their in-laws and husbands?


I feel all women need to change their mindset and learn to stop taking guilt trips on account of housework. Men never seem to go on such trips, they are blissfully unawares and are at peace. It is time we learnt their secret.


If Men are from Mars it is time women immigrated to Mars as living on Venus is no longer good for their sanity.

32 comments:

injaynesworld said...

What is this "housework" of which you speak? ;)

Yet another perk of being single. All my crap is my own.

These days the topic my girlfriends and I most discuss is osteoporosis and how we can afford to fall off our horses anymore.

bollywoodstylediaries said...

My husband is more of a clean freak than me..But you are right guys in general are not aware of dust. Not sure if its the social programming since no one goes around telling sons its ok to be dirty..I think they are just programmed that way..As for girls, they should clean becoz they want to, not becoz its required of them:-)

memunish said...

I usually like things to be clean around me but somehow I do not see the dust as much as my wife. So maybe I am programmed that way and my wife the other way.

magiceye said...

centuries of conditioning...

Purba said...

Household chores is the most mind numbing job in the world. If we want to keep the kitchen sink sparkling, the clothes folded in neat stacks..is because it makes us happy, less guilty.

Men don't notice neither do they care. The dust on the fan doesn't bother them it bothers us.

Nalini Hebbar said...

A newly wed wife with stars in her eyes takes on all the housework but soon realizes it is a thankless job...the worst thing that can happen is the obsession that sets in that say's, "the house reflects the character of the wife; which leads to the never-ending scrubbing and polishing. Being a working woman I refused to be trapped by that thought. I clean only when I feel I 'want' to not when it is needed of me. My husband is a 'cleanfreak' and I let him have his fun with pleasure!

Shilpa Garg said...

There were times, when I would prefer to do all the household chores myself or re-do the work, which the maid had done. But over the years, I have realized that these are never-ending, thankless jobs. So, still my home is spotlessly clean, but I now ensure that the maids do the work properly.

I guess, men in general are blind-eyed to these things. But my father assists my mom in dusting et al. And my hubby is so passionate about cooking that he can cook anything in a jiffy,anytime. Of course, there is double cleaning after his adventures in the kitchen. :D

Shilpa said...

:D am still single and ready to mingle...

Prateek said...

"I feel all women need to change their mindset and learn to stop taking guilt trips on account of housework. Men never seem to go on such trips, they are blissfully unawares and are at peace. It is time we learnt their secret."

Ignorance is bliss as they say. Nothing secret about it, we just don't give two hoots for cleanliness or are usually too preoccupied thinking about ways to solve some international political crisis that we don't notice such things.

Chatterbox said...

I am a cleanliness freak and that is a curse in all senses :(
I love things spotless clean and that is the sole source of my misery. My hubby shares my passion for cleanliness but in only 0.00000001 fraction of my obsession, hence you'll see me re-doing things even after he's actually done a lot of these (incompletely or absolutely unsatisfactorily to my liking).

I am seriously working on this bad habit of mine, but haven't made any progress as yet :( :(

That was a fantastic fun read, loved that picture :D :D

RoseBelle said...

Since I'm at home and he goes to work, he doesn't see what's been done around the house. I tell my husband regularly that the house does not clean itself. You are right, the list of things we do go on and on.

To answer your question, I think women are nurtured to be more attentive and to do all the things that we do. Men aren't nurtured that way, they're brought up to learn the value of good work ethic, to provide for their family, to protect their family, and all those manly stuff. Regardless of how a man and a woman is brought, a marriage is all about teamwork.

Samadrita said...

Awesome post as usual Lazy P.But you know what?I'm already an inhabitant of Mars..so I think.
I only thing that I have any interest in is my pc...I clean it every other day.About the rest of the surfaces accumulating dust in the house....I'm blissfully unaware of. :P
Okay maybe that's gonna change when I'm married.
But trust me if my man doesn't help me with the chores of his own accord I WILL make him. :P

Phoenixritu said...

Sigh, wish I was from Mars. Hate cleaning, but sadly I notice cobwebs on pelmets and greasy cabinets

Smitha said...

I wish I would emigrate too! That is just what I need!

Smita said...

hehehe as you said the list is endless....ab kal hi, I keep telling my hubby to wipe off the floor everytime he uses the washroom and as usual he forgets doing it.

Yesterday I finally told him, forget the cleanliness part think if I slip off in this stage then what will happen. The next time washroom was clean I hope it stays that ways for some time!!!

I dnno the logic behind as to why these things are visible to us only!!! In fact there is no logic! I guess we are all made this ways!

Deeps said...

Oh yes I'm all for emigrating to Mars!

sonal said...

Nice Post Vineeta, yeah Housework is a reaL drag women can neber escape from. And yes, women friends do act as a real buffer against all that we face from our husbands! but women are from venus only and men from Mars. The east and west are two diff worlds and never the twain shall meet!

Pooja said...

Hey LP, nice moral :D! and awesome cartoon choice!

men I feel think these little intracacies of housework are mundane and dont deserve a bout of cribbing. make them do ecen one thing like getting a glass of water, and there will be a barrage of complaints coming our way.

either women should move to Mars, or if not that men should be deported to Venus. at least they'll know how not-so-easy it is.

Kartik JK said...

Funny but Made me think too! Nice post yaar ! Enjoyed reading it!!

RGB said...

Loved the post. Though I don't enter the kitchen or do any of the regular household chores (unless my maid is not around and I don't have a choice), I could absolutely relate to the post. About heaving our chest and sighing and yapping (all at the same time) about husbands (and children)...feels good.

Women seem to have a good eye for detail and love to keep home squeaky clean, bcoz nobody expects men to do home-work and women can't take criticisms or comparisons, can they?

Mr. Stupid said...

This was a nice post. Loved that cartoon. That's a great list. BTW, Washed laundry needs to be folded? Stuffing them in the drawer is easier. Right?
Have a good day, LP :)

Lakshmi Rajan said...

If women migrate to mars, men will migrate to neptune :P

Journomuse said...

Hmmm...true...I have so many friends these days - married and in relationships where its the guy who is better around the house than his significant other. Loved your title...That's my favourite line of the piece

zephyr said...

You are right. It is time we learnt the art of ignoring the dust on the TV and grease on the stove top, because men do not see the rationale behind doing unproductive work, as housework is labelled! So what are the formalities of migrating? I want to be among the first!:)

The Holy Lama said...

Hope Mars doesn't have dust and things get cleaned by themselves

Meira said...

I think a lot of us get fed up of reminding the husbands of the task and end up doing their portions of work too. I have realised that reminding him a hundred times to do something requires a lot of patience, but this way I don't end up with his share of work!

SavvY said...

Hey Lp, i'm not regular in blogosphere these days coz i'm stuck with my studies and my office. . With the tax audits coming nearer every day, the fact that i'm so lazy isn't helping. . .
Now bout the post, i can live with dust in each and every part of my house. I have no prob with it . . . So i don't care bout it. . And bout women going to mars, isn't there some sort of passport thing to stop it. . . Happy houseworking. . And may be u should try ignoring the dust accumulating in the surfaces, drain and pipes getting slimy green, the garbage bin stinkin. . U'll get a smell of mars!

Rajendra Raikwar said...

Good one

Rachna Srivastava Parmar said...

So true, Vinita about the girl friends bit. I feel myself connecting much more openly with girls after marriage. And, yes about the million chores that you do. You know I hate housekeeping and cleaning, but one has to when one runs a home. Apart from that my own professional work and the kids, and it seems like 24 hours are less. I don't know how or why have these jobs fallen into our kitty, but we have to grin and bear them.

Corinne Rodrigues said...

Housework never ends does it? I have learnt not to be so finicky about things any more - there are more important things than a little dust. ;)

Lazy Pineapple said...

Girlfriends are god sent :) I agree it is so difficult when you have to do so many chores and most of which are thankless.

Lazy Pineapple said...

I have learnt it too...this is an old post and I was quite finicky then :) Now I am much relaxed about things..

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