Monday, 13 April 2009

To lose friends and avoid people

There are times in your life when each one of us wanted to avoid certain category of people. We have actually taken efforts to run away from them and disappear. Here are a few people whom most of us tend to avoid.

1) MLM (Multi level Marketing) or the AMWAY person : I have been hounded by these people for so long, I became a pro at avoiding them really well. They are mostly your friends or acquaintances at one point of time.

Once they join any MLM company with dreams of getting rich in a jiffy, there persona completely changes. Supercharged with the idea of spreading the riches around, they start roping in all the people they have ever met in their life with a wild frenzy to climb the MLM ladder.

The poor suckers who get temporary blindness with rupee signs flashing in their eyes fall for it really hard. Whereas cynical and jaded people like 'yours truly' run as fast they can.

When I was in college, this mad wave of people joining the company 'Amway' suddenly attacked my city. My neighbours, my cousin and many friends became members and tried all their wily tactics to make me a member. I was looked down upon by many as a brainless critter who is running away from prosperity. I thank God that I did not join the bandwagon.

2) Insurance Salesman: Again, this category can be made up of friends but they are mainly people you know in passing or are distant relatives.

They are like a dog with a bone. They will literally make your life a living hell. Since you know them, you have to entertain their calls and visits and sit through painful and descriptive narration of the Insurance Policies. How the policy is beneficial to your well being will be reiterated to you again and again.

To make them go away you have to either take a policy which is an expensive affair or desperately search for someone who is thinking of taking up a policy and quickly shifting the spotlight to the victim you have searched.

3) Credit Card Salesman: These people are like octopus. They will use their tentacles to catch their prey and literally squeeze life out of them. I am very cautious with such people. With their slick tongues and their glittering eyes they will make you dream many a dreams and that too with just a swish of the card. They will make shopping sound like a dream come true and will completely forget to highlight the most important aspect of paying up.

Many a sucker has fallen for there shenanigans and have been woken up rudely from their dreams when the monthly bill arrived by post.

4) The complainer : These people are never satisfied in life. They are always waiting for that perfect life to happen. To feel good all they do is complain. Also, they are unhappy with other people's success. Comparing assets and bank balances is one of their favourite hobbies.

All of us meet this type at least once in our life. More than not they are related quite closely to us and some are even friends who never showed their true colours in the beginning of friendship. It is difficult to avoid such people so the best way to deal with them is to stuff your ears with cotton, put on a sad face and nod your head after every few minutes and keep saying 'Yes, I understand.

5) The Mr. Know it all : The name says it all. There is not a topic on earth on which they cannot speak on. They have an opinion on everything whether they actually know anything about the subject or not.

They are opinionated and bombastic and will never leave an opportunity to show you what a nincompoop you are. You just cannot have an opinion and even if you do have one or even are an expert in that area your word does not hold any meaning. They can actually harm our self esteem.

There are milder version of such people all around us. They can be usually found in the position of our bosses. But, if you meet the original specimen all you should do is, run for your life like a rabid dog is after you.

It is not possible to avoid all these people. Some of them are in your social circle whom you do meet in everyday life. You need to be able to master the art of tackling these personalities with practice and patience. Though sometimes you do wish that 'Houdini' could have taught you the disappearing act.

11 comments:

Kaustubh said...

Credit Card Salesman!

Hmm...the last time I heard...Mr A. was with Credit Card division of a reputed bank - and guess what! He was leading 'Sales' team :)

BTW, your title mentioned 'To lose friends' as well...was no mention of that in the main text.

AmitL said...

ROFL..Aquarius,I've met and detest each of these kind of people.
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To be honest, we were one of those lured into the Amway thingie- this friend of mine from the US of A convinced us to buy a kit..well,the samples didn't get finished for 10 years,and we finally threw them away.Never again..:)
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Credit card salesmen,insurance salesmen,....arghhh!! And,you forgot the loan-givers...those who have so much money they want to give you ten times your salary by way of a loan...this specially true out here in Dxb...Whew!
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The mr-know it all and the complainer- save me from such people- I avoid going to parties coz one of their type invariably hitches on to me,since I'm a good listener...and, even a Saridon does not work afterwards.
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Are these last two types the ones you meant,in the title' how to lose friends...'????Cheerio!!Tks for a good laugh.

Aquarius said...

Kaustubh: Mr. A thankfully was never a credit card salesman.
Also, with regards to your query some of our friends do belong to one of the categories hence in the title 'To lose Friends' -Especially the Amway guy :)

Aquarius said...

Amit : awww the Amway thing was an actual nightmare. And many of my friends did it and I used to avoid them like plague hence 'To Lose friends and ...'

Yes I did not mention the 'Loan giver' basically because I have taken some loan and cannot say illwill about them right now ;)

I am glad I made you laugh.

ggop said...

Superb summary of the jhelus in one's life :-)
I'd say 4 and 5 annoy me the most because they usually are friends or relatives.

Aquarius said...

thanks gayu...yeah I know these people are a real pain in the neck :)

Kadambari said...

Now this is a brilliantly compiled list of friends turning into stalkers and people transforming into hounds. Seriously, they are such a pain and so difficult to get rid of.

Aquarius said...

Thanks Kadambari. Yeah you can call them stalkers :)

Vyazz said...

I once had a high school teacher who was actually a part time Amway sales person. Man, the sort of confidence they peddle their god awful wares under your nose, its really hard to turn them down. Fortunately my parents wizened up pretended to be "away" every time they showed up at our door step!!

Aquarius said...

hehehe Vyazz such a smart move. Actually Amway products are quite good only that the whole chasing for membership thing was bugging

Aquarius said...

hehehe Vyazz such a smart move. Actually Amway products are quite good only that the whole chasing for membership thing was bugging

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